The Year in My Writing Life 2010

For the past six years I have been putting together a year-end rundown of the year in my writing life. It helps me to move forward knowing where I have been.

Sincere thanks to those of you who have offered me opportunities to share my gifts with the world and to my friends who are always cheering me on.

 ~Clare

Writing Activities 2010

Nominee, Dzanc Books’ Best of the Web 2011 for “Winter Brought Out All the Knives,” by Melusine: Woman in the 21st Century

“Eating the Heart First,” first published by Eclectica Magazine, was selected and read by Nic Sebastian for Whale Sound. http://whalesound.wordpress.com/

Author/Instructor, of a poetry workshop for middle school students—“Vision and Voice: Introducing Youth to Poem-Making” for the Festival of Words, Fall 2010 Coordinator/Administrative Assistant, Festival of Words, September 2010

Contributing writer, Acting Up (in Acadiana) upcoming project “Car A Van”

Volunteer for the Open Mic Series at Casa Azul in Grand Coteau, LA—generating press releases for the series’ scheduled readings and performances.

Appearance/interview/live reading with Lana Maht Wiggins and Patrice Melnick on KRVS:Radio Acadie— University of Louisiana at Lafayette’s campus station hosted by Judith Meriwether www.krvs.org 88.7 FM April 13th, 2010 to promote National Poetry Month, the Casa Azul Open Mic Series and the co-reading with Lana Maht Wiggins.

Completed and submitted Eating the Heart First—collection-length poetry manuscript to two publishers.

 

Public Reading

Open Mic Series at Casa Azul

            Featured Poet with Lana Maht Wiggins, Grand Coteau, LA April 15th 2010

Publications 2010

“White Bull, Black Road,” Scythe, Vol. II, 2010

“The Woman You Married,” Scythe, Vol. II, 2010

“Little Poem at Pink Moon.” Scythe, Vol. II, 2010

 “Memento Mori” THE RED ROOM: Writings from Press 1, anthology, 2010 

“Mute” Blue Fifth Review, the blue collection 1, anthology series, 2010

 “Winter Brought Out All the Knives” Melusine 2.2 Spring/Summer 2010

“Birthing” Avatar Review, Issue 12, Summer 2010

“Make a New Garden” Avatar Review, Issue 12, Summer 2010

“The Never That Was” Avatar Review, Issue 12, Summer 2010

“Father Almost Drowning” Poets and Artists (O&S) Vol. 3, Issue 7, August 2010

“Open Me with a Fire of Words” Wild Goose Poetry Review, August 2010

“The White Crane” Featured Nonfiction, Referential Magazine, September 2010

“Premature” Literary Mama, “Desiring Motherhood” series October 2010

New Publication

My poem “Premature” is up at Literary Mama as part of their “Desiring Motherhood” series.  I am so grateful this poem has a home at Literary Mama. It is an older poem and one that is close to my heart.

Thanks to the editors for selecting my work.

The White Crane

My creative non-fiction piece, “The White Crane” has been published today at Referential Magazine. I hope you enjoy it and let me know what you think.

Thanks to editors Jessie Carty and Eleanor Bryan for selecting my work and sharing their audience with me.

I Am Today

I learned today that my creative non-fiction piece “The White Crane” will be featured as the spotlight nonfiction piece at Referential Magazine very soon.  This piece of writing is very special to me. Writing it was a high mark in my recovery from the ravages of untreated bipolar disease. 

I am in recovery.  I always will be. I am not cured of bipolar disease. My illness is being treated with medication and therapy.  But there is a deeper sense of recovery to which I am referring, and to which I am deeply committed. I am recovering from emotional trauma which damaged me and kept me suffering for many years even though the most pronounced symptoms of bipolar were abated.  

The actual writing of “The White Crane” signified closure for me of a dark time in my life that included six or so hospitalizations in mental hospitals, misdiagnosis, turmoil in my family, job losses and loss of so much of my self-worth.  I have been clawing my way back to peace and sanity ever since with the full awareness that I could have another breakdown and another and another.  The disease is just that insidious.  But I am today because of the health care I receive, the love and support of family and friends and because of writing. 

I will say it again:

Each success, no matter how small, in practice of what I love is a lightning strike against the dark. 

I have had high hopes for this piece for many years and I couldn’t be happier with its placement at Referential.  Much thanks to Jessie Carty and Eleanor Bryan for selecting my work and sharing their audience with me.

I will post an announcement when it is published.

An Excerpt

Here is a very brief excerpt from my creative nonfiction piece, Nacona, about my horse by that name, which was a gift to me from my parents when I was a teenager.  I revised the piece tonight and submitted it to a magazine that has previously published my poetry.  I’m hoping they will take this piece as well.

 

 

…The drainage ditch is wide with water.  Nacona heaves over it because I ask her to. We slide three feet in the mud.  Nacona’s back legs give out and she rolls me off. My feet dangle out of the stirrups and I rise unbroken but soaking with mud.  A. is riding the Thoroughbred gelding, Lucky, and she turns back to laugh at me.  I burn with humiliation. I scoop a patty of mud with both hands and hurl it at her. Lucky half-rears and breaks into a sideways gallop. A. stops Lucky and hops off his back.  She trudges through the field wildly threatening me. I cup another whopping pound of mud and throw it smack dab in her face.  Her mouth is open blurting a curse and now she’s choking out black mud.  Her choking turns to laughter and she fills her hands with a solid mud bomb.  It hits me in the right boob.  That’s it. Our mud fight’s a free-for-all… 

Haiti

My prayers and thoughts for healing the suffering of your people go out to you…I have and will continue to give what I can.

My prayers, too, are for all who are suffering in mind and body.

Text HAITI to 90999 to donate $10 on behalf of the American Red Cross. — Text YELE to 501501 to donate $5 on behalf of The Yele Haiti Foundation.

Nice to meet ya, again.

OFFICIAL BLOG RENEWAL POST001-1014

 

Each success, no matter how small, in practice of what I love is a lightning strike against the dark.  And I have been in dark, metaphorically dark and literally extinguished places. I’ve been around fires a blazin’ too and they can be happy places!

Ah ha, yes. Well.

I am a poet/mother/wife living with bipolar disease. I have been blessed with clarity and stability in my medical situation for a few years with the effort put in by my strong team of caregivers medically, in the healing arts, and through the support of loving family members who have stood by me. I had recurring traumas and “breakdowns” in my life which robbed me of many things.  I was unhappy and clinically sick for most of the 1990s.

I’m gaining back my life, which could have been lost, had I succumbed to the disease and died. (And yes Bipolar kills.  Look up the suicide rates of bipolar people, people!) I have been gaining back my sense of self and finding healing through writing.  There’s a link between mental illness and creativity. My interest would be: poets who have bipolar disorder.  This is a hot topic and I expect to weigh in on it from time to time.

I’ve always been a writer, writing up to this very sentence, poems, plots, plays and peddling pure phiction.  

I am a lifelong resident of Louisiana, and a graduate of the University of Southwestern Louisiana, now called University of Louisiana at Lafayette. I majored in English and minored in Philosophy—the perfect match of disciplines for a budding poet.  I published a few poems in college, got married, and only sporadically wrote for a few years. 

When I feel the aura of a poem coming on to me so clearly,  I am moved by words yet forming, as if words could ride air and pass through my skull, form the syllables in my mind and mouth, and I get up from whatever I was doing and write something.  Writers write.  Thinkers think. Thoughts fly away until you put the thought-words on a piece of paper or enter them into a computer—then you are a writer, for having written it. Congratulations!

Pre-Poems/Free-Writes— the mystique of this airwave/brainwave/of what was working in my subconscious/some feathery slip of a thing flits from its dark hiding place and dawns in the mind.

I was a lazy writer, in the sense that I did not demand it of my self. I wanted to learn how to do it my way.  Not in a conventional class room.  I wanted to be in my environs living and drawing my poems from the right here that I am living. The within: my domestic life, sex life, body life, mind’s life, and my natural life as a creature on this planet with other creatures, domesticated and not.

I am in the pursuit of the image. It is my starting point in all writing I do.  What is the image?  Observation is the key. I am also an amateur photographer, so for me it is usually a visual stimulus. A description must encompass, not describe too much but rather show in deft and artful language the essence, the charm of it.

Is it startling?  Is it sustainable? What I mean is does it having lasting qualities to live on in the poem if we construct an environment for it to thrive? Will its meaning inspire other meanings which may or may not conflict with the intended meaning.  Does this matter?  If it is what it is and you want that image/those words, then you choose. Poetry is making choices.  Words-connections-shaping-breaking-exploding and putting the poem back together, or not– are the choices of the artist.  Read poetry, get inspired, and learn to make choices.  Major choices are definitive; some choices allow a little wiggle.

That’s what it is about.

I am building around a central image, not always, but habitually.  Images come from things and we get to know things through our senses, sight, smell, taste, hear and touch, so images come from the basic 5 senses—this is basic knowledge of what is concrete and what it abstract in the study of poetry but it is crucial because by utilizing these tools you can transform, imagine, ignite passionate responses, and through words you can bloodlessly crush people in a way they like to or would rather not like to be crushed.   

So when I return I will speak of why I am in pursuit of the image as it is stated at the top of the blog.

 I welcome comments for friendly and heartily espoused discussions.  What I have written here is brief and leaves many questions to me but I wanted to holdback so questions could be put to me and any other readers for discussion.

Poet(ess) Extraordinaire

http://lanawiggins.wordpress.com/

 

The link above directs you to my good friend and wonderful poet Lana Maht Wiggins’ blog. 

Lana and I read at Casa Azul last week and are considering some future collaborations poetry-wise! Please check her page out and comment.  Tell others who you think might be interested.  More info can be found at her page.  She is an astonishingly gifted poet, a great woman and friend.

Modified Response to a Friend’s Comment Elsewhere: A Manifesto?

I want to write because I want to write.

I have something to prove to myself, to the world in a way, yes…but I need to remember that writing is a joyful act and I should not be pained with “having to prove” syndrome. Meaning I shouldn’t write from that headspace, you know?

This is the challenge: trying to get beneath the surface and into the ground of myself. I want to find the poetry in me—to write from the deepest heartspace and clearest headspace.

I want to tap into a vein of knowing that offers up resonant and authentic insight. I want to know and write what I know in a clear voice. I want to avoid Baroque language—by keeping it real, cohesive and accessible, and by enlivening but not burdening the language.

I want the authority to say it. I want to clear away the dross…for me it is simply about the work–doing the work.

I don’t want to be a lazy writer (anymore.) I don’t want to get caught up in the externals—publishing just to boost my ego comes to mind only because I have had a string of rejections in the past couple of months (I was only sparingly submitting work, sending drafts and more than likely sending things to markets that wouldn’t be a good fit for my work in the first place.) It was a kick in the derriere that forced me to refocus on the writing: love the work I do, find the core—what say you?

Promises

I promise I will update this blog more often.

Soon…